Stop Using The Weighing Scale To Measure Your Self Worth

Why is it that we women often define our own worth by our appearance? “Oh I wish I was slim,” or “If only I had curves.” These are the kind of words that linger in our trial rooms, pushing us to put the yearned garment back on the rack. These harsh words of self-criticism also harm our chances of feeling happy and deserving of love or respect. While “If you do not love yourself, how do you expect others to love you,” is an overused saying, it admittedly does have a lasting impact.

Our weight should not be a deciding factor for how we value ourselves. No matter what the numbers on the weighing scales say, they don’t measure our beauty, success and how our loved ones view us. Contrary to what our self-doubt may tell us, our well-wishers do not love us for how we look.

Comparison Is Our Biggest Foe

Everybody’s body is built differently. While a person next to you could have a slim waist and a big chest and hips– the “ideal” body type– they may weigh twice as much as you. Similarly, another person who probably eats twice as much as you may have a lean physique. That’s the beauty of individuality. Not everyone is meant to look and weigh the same. 

At an insightful panel discussion on self-worth at the Digital Women Awards 2023, Aparna Thyagarajan, the founder of Shobitam, made a remarkable point on self-worth and individuality. 

She said, "I very strongly believe that what the weighing scale shows, or what your measurements are or your skin tone should not define our self worth at all.... Our handlooms, our rich heritage, weaves, and art forms that we have across India are as varied as our individual personalities."

This correlation of the human body with ethnic handlooms is an important reminder to avoid comparing our bodies with others. Beauty can come in several different forms– dark, fair, tall, fat, stout, freckled, or wrinkled– just like carefully curated art, where each piece is unique and cannot be duplicated.

How To Stop Coupling Self-Worth With Appearance?

The advertising industry may make us believe that looking a certain way is the “right” way and try to sell us diet food, supplements, shapewear, and more such products which probably do not even work. But the truth is, they are just feeding into your insecurities and self-doubts and giving you what you think you need instead of what you genuinely need.

While the journey of turning our insecurities into our strengths and discovering our self-worth can be long and full of bumps, the final realisation of our worth can foster a transcendental relationship with oneself. The best way to take this road to self-discovery is by reminding ourselves of our end goal every day and before every obstacle.

Taking care of our physical and mental health, indulging in nourishing food, spending time with our loved ones, and being grateful to ourselves for our little successes should be our priorities. Just like Thyagarajan said, our body is like art which deserves to be handled with care and appreciated for the intricate details.

Views expressed by the author are their own

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