Desi culture is obsessed with sanskari girls. To define the term, 'sanskari', such girls are the ones who prefer everything 'traditional' and are sarva gunna sampanna. They are good at all household chores and are loved by everyone. We wish things were changing but even today, society wants women to be traditional, fantastic cooks, a 'perfect' mix of modern and traditional, a combination of 'shy' and 'confident' and she must nearly always make good samosas and laddoos (just kidding, we hope not.)
So I thought we can redefine term sanskari and this is how.
Here are 6 must-have qualities for all sanskari girls
1. Financial Independence
All 21st Century sanskari girls must be financially independent. Having to depend on your in laws and husband for money can give them reasons to take you for granted. At no point do I want a life where someone says, "I allowed my wife to spend on herself."
It is extremely important to know your worth and make people around you realise that you can manage your own expenses. Financial independence empowers women.
2. Opinionated
People are quick to assume that women should not have a say in the matters of the house or careers or anything else. All they are expected to do is follow orders and not have an opinion of their own. Let's change that.
A new definition of sanskari must come with rights to opinions. But as the members of a family, women must have a view regarding the internal affairs of their home. Discrimination begins at home and if not controlled at the basic level, it can reach a toxic level. Let's begin the lesson of equality at home today.
3. Confidence to say 'no' to a forced marriage
A marriage without consent is an unhappy one. The society will try to get you hitched in all possible ways. But you have to have the self confidence to not hastily accept any rishta that comes your way. Who you want to spend your life with must be your decision. One wrong move and you are left with nothing but regret.
4. Remember, motherhood is a choice
Whether you want to have a child or not should be your choice. Motherhood, if forced can become a bitter experience. You might fail to provide your child with the love and care they deserve if you are forcefully made to give birth. Women no longer need kids to feel complete. They are enough for themselves.
5. Take time to adjust
As soon as women are married and step into a new home, they are asked to compulsorily adjust from day one. However, we know it is not an easy job. There is no need to hurry with accepting a new lifestyle. Give yourself as much time as you need to adjust. It is your right and you do have the liberty.
6. You don't have to be 'homely'
Indians' desire for a 'homely' bride is not coming to an end any time soon. They want educated bahus but want them to stay at home. But it does not seem to be a good idea to waste your education and hard work that way. Break the stereotype. Follow your dreams. Your marital status does not define you. Your success does.