The MMS Video Controversy Of Shilpi Raj: Why Is It The Woman's Fault?

Bhojpuri singer Shilpi Raj is being slut-slammed for an intimate video leak. So, how many of us know the man and the man making the video with her?

I don’t think anybody cares to find out either. One can say "she is the celebrity, not him" to this I want to shake your memory a bit. Remember a few years back an explicit scene from Radhika Apte’s movie The Wedding Guest went viral on social media. The scene had her and actor Dev Patel but he was barely mentioned in the controversy, even though he plays an equal part in the scene. “The leaked sex scene features both Radhika Apte and Dev Patel. But the scenes are being spread only in my name. Why people are not spreading rumours under the male actor Dev Patel’s name?” Radhika had said at the time. This is exactly what I want to point out, Dev Patel is an equally well-known name but he was left out. The same was the case with another Bhojpuri actress Trisha Kar Madhu’s viral videos. Why in cases such as these the woman is slut-slammed while the man is not questioned?

Controversy Of Shilpi Raj: Why men and women aren’t treated equally when it comes to viral videos?

I remember another viral video where some boys had lured a couple of girls to a remote place and were misbehaving. Later in the comments section, the girls were being slammed for going to unknown places with boys, and the said boys were not questioned.

In Kar Madhu’s case, she had accepted that this video was made with her boyfriend but she had not shared or leaked it on social media and requested anyone who got it to delete it and not to spread it further. I leave the question ‘why make such a video in the first place’ for Kar Madhu to answer. She is free to make any video she deems right. I want to take the debate a bit further by saying ‘why can’t she make such a video?’ Are we trying to say that women are non-sexual beings or that women have no right to sexual urges?

Shilpi Raj is seen getting intimate with a man named Vijay Chauhan, reportedly both were in a relationship. The video also has a third-person man making the video. Surprisingly both the men have covered their faces while Raj’s face is not covered. That says a lot.

While Kar Madhu’s video was personal property, Raj’s video was made by a third person and the intentions were not honourable obviously.

Suggested Reading:

When Will Schools Stop Policing Girls For Predatory Behaviour Of Men?

Our society is not comfortable with a woman’s body 

Our society is okay to see a man’s bare chest but there are certain unwritten rules for women in a patriarchal society. One of them is that women should be ashamed of being a woman, should be ashamed of their bodies and ashamed of all their bodily desires as well. “Why is the skirt so short? The neckline so low?” all stem from this rule. No matter what, a woman should always keep her body covered. So, how can Shilpi Raj dare to show herself in an intimate position is also part of this thought process.

Are women hungry for attention?

Why is it that when there are two consenting adults in a video clip, especially which is explicit that the woman is labelled attention-hungry? And that she leaked it herself to garner attention. Why can’t we accept what the woman says which in Kar Madhu’s case that she had not leaked it? In Raj’s case, we don’t know the reason or pressure behind the video but it was leaked with malicious intent causing distress to the singer. Let’s just ask ourselves, they are well-known personalities in the Bhojpuri film industry why would they need a scandal?

Public places are not for women

If we see a couple cuddling or kissing or even hugging in a park we are quick to label the woman ‘besharam’ or shameless while the boy will be left scot-free saying ‘boys will be boys’. A woman cannot engage in PDA in our society, especially if they are not married. Now, the videos of Raj and Kar Madhu show them being intimate with their boyfriends, so, now people feel free to say “she’s shameless”, “available”, “is dishonouring her family” and so on because social media platforms are the public places.

Too many issues to handle

There were too many issues (patriarchal issues) in Raj’s case. First, the leaked video showed her in an intimate moment with her partner, she was ‘not married’, unmarried girls cannot indulge in intimate acts. Second, she showed skin, which is a total taboo in our society. Third, how can a woman bring disrepute to her family, for isn’t the family’s ‘honour’ attached to her sexuality?

In the end, I would like to say that we should have stricter cyber media laws to help people, especially a woman who says that she has not leaked an explicit video and stop her reputation from being ruined. Shouldn’t authorities take notice of this? Shouldn’t society trust its women? Shouldn’t we wait for the real picture to emerge before slut-slamming the woman? What everyone fails to remember is that women are also responsible citizens of this society who will not deliberately go out there and do something sensational for the heck of it.

The views expressed are the author's own.