This Single Dad Took Care Of His Pregnant Daughter By Making Nutritious Laddus!

Last Sunday we all were remembering and wishing our moms on Mother’s Day. Nobody can take her place we know. But here’s a dad who was no less than a mother to his pregnant daughter. Netizens were floored by this hands-on father or should we say mother!

We’ve heard so many stories of moms donning the hat of a father when a dad passes away. But a social media story where a father takes on the role of a mother for a pregnant daughter melted hearts. A Twitter user Sanjay Pande, a retired Colonel shared his struggle to do all things a mother would for her pregnant daughter. His wife had passed away and more than a year later his daughter informed him that he is to become a proud grandfather. He tweeted, “My wife passed away and a year plus later my daughter informed me that I was going to be a grand dad soon. Traditionally, I, father, as lone surviving parent, would have been most useless guy around in pregnancy days, post pregnancy period, baby’s growth etc. I was a fighter.”

Story of Single Father Colonel Sanjay Pande

He then went on to write, “I decided to be my daughters ‘mother’. Right from the day she informed me, I planned her traditional diet, learnt by researching through nights, YouTube, elders, books and everything I could lay my hands on. The FIRST batch of laddus for 30 days was ready. Problem? Delhi & UK!”

It’s heartening to know that he did all this while living in Delhi and yet provided his daughter with healthy & nutritious food who lived in the UK. Due to Covid restrictions he couldn't travel but made sure his daughter was provided with everything an Indian mother would do.

We all know how during pregnancy a woman’s taste buds and appetite change drastically especially in the first trimester. Col Pande writes, “Vacuum packing machine, food-grade plastics, freezing laddus for 96 hrs, packing as sending them by parcel to the UK!!! The first lot saved my daughter's life since she was eating nothing. 15 days later the second different type of laddus was made and frozen. 21st day dispatched!”

This kick-started a process, he further writes, “The cycle started. Every type of healthy & nutritious food that a traditional Indian mother would give to her daughter, was made by me. Hygiene, calculation of nutrients, calories, the weight of laddus, storing technique etc. all were meticulously written down.”

In the next thread, he tweeted that he fed her nutrients sitting here in India. All during the eight months, she was fed what she would have got if she were here in India with him. Then he says his next challenge was what to feed her post-pregnancy? So, he started his research again, he looked into foods & superfoods which helped in lactation or increasing milk and then he dispatched the first lot of laddus in August. This process continued till he could finally visit the UK where he then prepared in bulk. He also lists out what he added in the laddus, ingredients like Garden Cress, Edible Gum, Methi, Shatawari or many others.

He ends the thread by tweeting, “I never realised that what I did from Jan 2019 up to today was anything but my duty. A random thought triggered the thread today. I am amazed at response, comments, suggestions & kind words from Twitter friends. Admitting unashamedly, you all made me cry today. Love you all.”

And the Twitterati did not disappoint, they showered him with love and ideas. One user wrote “Please write a book of recipes, reasons, emotions. Not all dad's and at times even mom's are having the skills, persistence and perseverance that you have sir. It will be a wonderful gift to such parents , expecting mother's and to the babies too.” While another said, “Please share it with many daughters of India who require you. We can organise a fund raiser and start up. A brilliant idea of canning laddus. I also had similar problems when my wife was carrying and I was posted to a god forshaken place.”

“Actually i wanna wish u Happy Mothers Day (heart emoji) to u as u ver the Mother to ur daughter in her Absence!!” tweeted a woman to the Colonel. Another user wrote, “A proactive parent/grandparent is a blessing at this sensitive time, be it a father or a mother. What a wonderful father you are. Your daughter is blessed.”

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I would like to add another tweet which puts everything together, “What a wonderful testament to being a parent... In the army it's normally the mom's who Don the additional hat of the dad... May all fauji dad's be like you...”

There are a few things that come to mind while reading this father’s struggle. That a parent whether a father or a mother will do anything in their power to help and protect their children. We need to remember that when a woman becomes a mother her partner also becomes a father, we tend to forget that he also has the same emotions for his baby, it’s just that he is not that vocal about it. That parenting is a joint responsibility, we see so many beautiful examples such as this that reiterate the fact and contrary to what we perceive " target="_blank" rel="noopener">men do realise this at some point. Lastly, children need both their parents and when one, unfortunately, passes away the other fills that vacuum. Kudos to such dads who make the world a better place for their kids!

The views expressed are the author's own.