On Selena Gomez's birthday, I sit here to decode her documentary 'My Mind And Me', an hour-and-a-half documentary where she discloses her struggles and accomplishments in life. She also dropped a single by the name of her documentary.
How does one begin to sum up the journey of a 30-year-old beautiful mind in one single article? This writer cannot assume to try to voice one of the strongest women to ever exist out there whose voice reaches millions of humans in the hopes to save their lives.
And all of the crashin' and burnin' and breakin', I know now
If somebody sees me like this, then they won't feel alone now
My Mind and Me, Selena’s latest single released on the 3 November, one day before the launch of her documentary of the same name. The single is a part of her documentary where Selena shares her entire life and in her own words ‘opens her heart’ to us. She shares her childhood, her mental health struggles, her bipolar disorder, her lupus condition, and her mind, shining a beacon of hope that if she could make it so can others like her.
My mind and me
We don't get along sometimes
And it gets hard to breathe
But I wouldn't change my life
Selena Gomez: My Mind and Me
Growing up little Selena always used to be afraid of storms. Mandy, her mother brought her books on it so she could learn more about it and overcome her fear. Because you cannot be afraid of what you know. Selena followed the same path with her mental health journey. Her only motive behind being this transparent and vulnerable in front of the world and media that scrutinised all of her moves has only been to help people out there.
Selena shares feeling like an imposter in her documentary and do not hesitate to share that she found the young girls in Kenya more confident than she had ever been at their age or is. For the longest time, she had no control over her emotions and kept hearing voices in her head telling her she isn't good enough. But she kept on seeking help to understand herself better and deal with her inner critic with patience even though it took a toll on her.
“My thoughts take over my mind often. It hurts when I think about my past. I want to know how to breathe again. Do I love myself? How do I learn how to breathe my own breath?”
When Selena was diagnosed with lupus her mother was scared she was not going to make it out alive. However, she did and she kept growing stronger every day facing her demons with courage. It takes courage to be kind when everywhere she went the ghosts of her past wouldn't let her be.
“When am I gonna be good enough just by myself not needing anybody to be associated with?”
Questions revolving around her past relationship always kept getting in her way. The paparazzi were more interested in knowing about her past love life than seeing her as her own individual and acknowledging her powerful body of work.
Selena has always been true to herself and that is something that shines through all of her work. Therefore, when the artist said “being honest that night helped”, her fans know that she meant it with every fibre of her being.
“It's about more than just a lost love. It is about me learning to choose myself, to choose life but also hoping that people can find grace and peace in that too,” said Selena to the critics who choose to reduce her music to just someone with a broken heart.
Acknowledging the girl in the mirror, Selena speaks to herself and sets an example for other women, “there is a girl who is crippled by anxiety and can’t move when she looks in the mirror. She smiles when everyone is looking but cries when she is alone. She hides because she’s terrified to show herself. My world is so empty. My world is so big and cold. I want joy and hope, clean air where I can finally breathe. What has been is not what will be.”
Her words ring strong with every woman on a journey to find themselves, “I’m at peace. I’m angry. I’m sad. I’m confident. I’m full of doubt. I’m a work in progress. I am enough. I am Selena.”
Every single time that society chose to bereft her of agency, Selena turned to her art to reclaim her narrative with class, “Just be who you are Selena. Just stop trying. No one cares about what you’re doing. It’s about who I am, being okay with where I am. I am grateful for my family. I am grateful for my friends. I am grateful to be alive.”
Selena’s documentary My Mind and Me serves as an inspirational piece of art for every woman out there trying to reclaim their footing in the world.
Suggested Reading: Selena Gomez Reveals She May Not Be Able To Bear Children In The Future
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