Tumne Duniya Nahi Dekhi: How Indian Families Override Young Women's Opinion

Whenever a young woman in our society expresses her opinion, she is cut off in the middle of her statement just for a man to complete it. She is told that her views hold little value as she does not possess the worldly experience that most elders, especially men do. She cannot be a part of the family conversation because she is a timid 15-year-old. This is ironic because the world is shaping up to the needs and requirements of the younger generation right now.

A woman’s opinion is often dismissed as nagging rather than an argument based on reason. Like everyone else, she has a right to speak, but does she? In India, whenever we have 'family' talk’ women are very rarely a part of the conversation, especially those from younger generation.

One of my friends recently recalled how a week ago her family got into a discussion on politics at the dining table. When she expressed her opinion, her father and other male members at the table ignored it and continued talking about how the economy is going to shrink in the next four months due to the failure of government policies. Swetha found it weird, not just because she is ignored by everyone including her own father, but also because the men around her had ignored the fact that she is an economics graduate.

Why opinions of young women are not taken seriously

While giving medicine to her father, before bed, she humbly asked him, “Why did you ignore my words on the dining table? You know that I graduated in economics”. To this, her father replied, “You are a young woman, you haven’t seen the world.”

There are many young women who might have had a similar experience. We can excel at something but cannot show it off, or somehow, are  not allowed to use our experiences and degrees to add weightage to our arguments. Young women in our society are sidelined by just one statement that they haven't seen the world, as if a grown-up man knows everything.

It is not a new concept where young women are told to zip up their opinion. For centuries, men have been given the privilege of validation when they talk, while women have been conditioned to listen to them. It is as if men possess all the tongues, and women just the ears. One tells what to do, how to do and when to do and the latter just does it.

The Factor Of Intimidation

A young woman who has a mind of her own is quite intimidating for any man. Think of any manic-pixie character from Bollywood, and now pay attention to the hero’s reaction to her, every time they talk. He looks exasperated and annoyed. That is what happens in most male-female everyday conversations because we subconsciously adopt the narrative that most young women only know about makeup and the latest reel trends. Wake up, that’s not the case with every woman you meet!

So dear men. if you truly believe in equality, the next time when your daughter wants to speak about the Ukraine-Russia war or the economic slowdown in the US at the dining table, just let her. Control that urge to either ignore or shut down her words. If your girlfriend wants to discuss the stock market with you, then the appropriate response is to listen to the things she has to say. Maybe you might learn one or two new things. But more importantly, the simple action of listening can urge other men around the said woman to take her views more seriously.

Views expressed are the author’s own.

Suggested Reading: Single Women: When Is Society Going To Give Them Due Respect?