Man's Appreciation Post On 'Ninja Wife' Invites Flak; Why Can't Men Share The Load?

The pandemic raised the issue of work-life balance to the fore. While most people were ecstatic to be able to work from home, others, mainly women, lamented that they did not have the same option. Many people complained of being burnt out due to the lack of breaks between the round-the-clock responsibilities of managing the house, children, and work. Now, a man's Facebook post about his "ninja" wife acing it all has prompted a heated online debate.

There has been a debate regarding whether working from home is preferable to working in an office since the pandemic established the new normal for practically everyone working from home. Himanshu Bhagat, a marketing employee, uploaded a photo of his wife working from the kitchen to demonstrate the reality of such situations.

Male Privilege Overlooked 

"She's looking over her team's work. I'm getting ready for the next meeting. Onion preparation. After that, I generally make tea. Managing a 5-month-old puppy," the husband enumerated in detail, impressing his wife. He also threw the phrase "managing me" into the mix.

Male privilege exists, and men do get things easier. He closed his statement by saying, "Let us be more appreciative and pitch in where we can." The tweet drew a lot of attention on social media and sparked a serious debate. While most people accepted it as the new normal, and many men began to refer to their spouses as "ninjas," others were less impressed.

Suggested Reading: Dear Men, Are You Oblivious to Your Privilege? Try Walking Alone At Night.

Many people believe that glorifying women's labour and sacrifices, as well as their being overloaded, is a serious issue. While some chastised the man for not doing enough to assist his wife, others claimed that the posts reek of the same luxury that he is attempting to denigrate. Someone inquired whether this is how he contributed in, by photographing her when she is hard at work rather than chopping onions. Others pointed out that not everyone appreciates their wife's efforts and takes things for granted.

Overworking Shouldn't Be Lauded

Although serving one's family may be a happy choice for some, at what cost?  Praising women for their multitasking abilities and handling both work and chores is just feeding fodder to the patriarchal thought that asks women to overwork themselves to a point their well-being is neglected. It undermines their labour. Many women are experts at multitasking and not by choice at all times; some were forced to develop the skill because they lacked options or shoulders to lean on.

Why can't everyone contribute to the chores? Why is a woman expected to do everything around the house while the husbands can loiter around not helping?

It's because of male privilege again. Being born as a man in India comes with additional perks that no man seems to understand ever. While society does feed them a really toxic idea of what masculinity is but they are never held accountable nor are they judged for not cooking, or cleaning the house, skills that are required for basic survival.

Work From Home Not Good For Women

A recent Harvard report has inferred that working remotely from home is not ideal for women. The report cites multiple studies that proved that flexible working contributed to the probable rise of work-family conflict because it will highly likely lead to expansion of work and increase the domestic burden.

The report further stated that men may prioritise their work spheres while women are more likely to take on more domestic responsibilities.

Instead of glorifying women's labour, why not join her and help her out? What will it take for men to realise that?

Views expressed are the author's own