Why Women Must Be Ready To Face Creepy Men All The Time?

When I was a teenager, I have memories of hiding from catcallers on the street by wearing clothes that were too big for me. Years and years later, as a working professional, I am still avoiding attention by squatting low in the driver's seat of my car.

Going out, I used to constantly hear catcalls. It was something I dismissed with a chuckle and a shrug. But now that I'm not young, everyone is much more conscious of how hostile and dangerous those things are.

It sadly has become quite acceptable to touch and speak to you in a way that is wholly inappropriate. After encountering everything from offensive remarks to inappropriate touches while in public since I was a teenager, I no longer feel confident strolling alone at the age of 24. Here is why:

The safety statistics for women in India are dismal. The year 2011 saw 228,650 crimes against women reported by the National Crime Records Bureau, including homicide, rape, kidnapping, and sexual harassment. India was voted the fourth-most hazardous country for women in the world that year, after Afghanistan, the Democratic Republic of the Congo, and Pakistan, according to an international poll.

Road Safety Of Women: Creepy men?

Generations have been frustrated by how women are treated in public, and it was Jyoti Singh's case—also known as “Nirbhaya”—that finally broke a long-standing Indian tradition that accepted lack of women's safety in public places as a normal part of daily life. Though a lot has been said and done it is still a failure in many cases.

Women and girls dread and encounter various forms of sexual assault in public settings, ranging from catcalls and unwanted groping to rape and femicide. In urban, rural, conflict or post-conflict contexts, this common problem occurs on streets, in and around public transportation, schools and businesses, public restrooms, water distribution facilities and parks.

In such situations, a woman would try her hardest to avoid making physical contact with the offender, whether by getting up from her seat on a bus or moving to a different part of the crowd. But why not shout louder? That's because even if she does, she can end up humiliated in front of a crowd of spectators who are all muted. She may find herself fighting all by herself.

Women are educated from an early age to put up with such "small" acts of harassment; as they become accustomed to the deeply ingrained patriarchy, even the older female family members frequently end up disregarding it and expecting the next generation to do the same.

Last month, around 8.30 p.m., I stepped outside to smoke and take a walk to unwind after a long day at work. My neighbourhood was poorly lighted, and while I was walking, a man on a bike completely caught me by surprise, squeezed my breast, and dashed away in an instant.

I remained still for five minutes. My legs were numb. It was impossible for me to move or even think under such circumstances, let alone write down the bike's number. I returned home at ten because I was terrified to go back. 

I was at a loss for words when my folks inquired what was taking me so long, so I didn't. I get enraged when I consider how cautious we must be to survive and how upsetting receiving compelled touch can be for the rest of your life. Many people, like myself, find it difficult to express themselves verbally during those moments when you just freeze. And what miracle, if any, would have occurred even if I had written down the number?  

Domestic abuse, which was previously largely ignored, now counts as a violation of human rights. However, the abuse and violence, particularly sexual harassment, that women and girls encounter in public places continue to be a problem that receives little attention.

Giving women the resources and chances to participate in city decision-making is the key to tackling this problem. With women in charge of looking at urban environments, the realities of women may be observed more clearly, allowing for the development of better, safer, and more liberating solutions. 

Suggested Reading: It Took A Pandemic For Us Women To Be Safe From Street Harassment

Currently, public sexual harassment is not a crime by itself. The phrase describes inappropriate sexual behaviour that can make survivors feel frightened and degraded, ranging from verbal statements to physical actions. 

The views expressed are the author's own.