Dear Mothers, Please Stop Telling These 25 Regressive Things to Your Daughters

Things mothers say: When our moms say regressive stuff to their daughters, do they have any idea how deep it goes? It breaks our self esteem and confidence. Mother's don't intend to but in the name of protecting their daughter, they remind us every minute that we are the weaker ones.

How can we fix this? May be by talking to to our moms? Here's a list I have drawn up of things girls have heard but shouldn't have to.

25 things mothers say to their daughters but should not

1. You have a job now. Start thinking of marriage.
2. You should learn to cook. Who will marry you otherwise?
3. Get back home before it's too late.
4. I know what's good for you. Don't raise questions in front of me.
5. Don't wear shorts in front of your uncles when they come home.
6. We are looking for a 'rich' and 'well settled' groom for you.
7. Lower your voice. Girls shouldn't scream that way.
8. Don't be like the girls you watch on TV.
9. You have to go to your 'own' home on growing up.
10. You are growing fat. Try losing some weight.
11. You won't be able to do it. It's not a girl's job.
12. You don't have any womanly traits.
13. Don't talk too much in front of your relatives.
14. Avoid laughing so loudly.
15. Why do you have to make so many guy friends?
16. Women should not stay alone.
17. Ask someone to drop you home. It's not safe for you to travel alone.
18. You are not depressed, you are just sad.
19. Don't be so overdramatic.
20. You are extremely difficult to handle.
21. Your friend is an ideal woman. You should be more like her.
22. You must learn to behave like an educated woman.
23. You have your limitations as a woman. Admit it.
24. You can't choose to be childfree. Childless women are incomplete.
25. Women always need a partner to take care of them.

Dear mothers, we love you and we know it's not easy for you to let go of your beliefs. But just like we try to obey you and respect your decisions, we want you to understand that you need to let us live an independent life and You have every right to be concerned about our safety but please don't use it as an excuse to prevent us from stepping outside. Instead, we would like you to encourage us to fight against difficult circumstances.

The society wants to cage us but as our mothers, we want you to set us free. We may not succeed every time. We'll make plenty of mistakes but it's these blunders that'll help us learn. That doesn't mean you prevent us from taking chances altogether. We are your daughters and all we want is your support to do well in life.

Suggested readings:

35 Things Mothers Should Stop Feeling Guilty About

How Bare Bellies Are Liberating To-Be Mothers From Pregnancy Stigmas

Mothers Are Not The Epitome Of Sacrifice. 5 Bengali Movies To Watch With This In Mind