Women Do Not Really Want Chocolates - They Can Get Them On Their Own

American novelist and writer of The Bluest Eye, Toni Morrison said, thin love is not loving at all. Being in love is the most challenging part even if love is the best thing. All women want, is to feel needed in a relationship, questions which feel like a hug - how was your day? How are you feeling? Do you want me to pick you up from the airport? Is there something I can do to understand your perspective? There are way better and more respectful things to give us other than just a box of chocolates even chocolates are too dear to say no to - particularly dark chocolates. 

But then as pampered as a woman may like to feel when their partner is going an extra mile to make them feel special, what we would really like is simply to feel safe and comforted around the person their heart accommodates. Feeling safe, comfortable, needed and communicated with are what we really expect to feel intimate with someone.

Chocolate Day

Needless to say, women do not really want chocolates - they can get them on their own. What if the times which women have read in the books for years started to play out in real life? Is it unreasonable to expect that? 

Like women, men also need to understand the concept of space in a relationship. Even if it is the person they love, men cannot simply feel entitled to their time as per their convenience. Besides, giving space to their partners is a way of getting to know themselves better and understanding the need to prioritise themselves more often. 

In our culture, dependence is stigmatised, especially among men. They frequently value independence and consider reliance to be a harmful weakness. According to Psychology Today, men’s resistance to becoming dependent in relationships comes with an obvious price. Thomas Joiner discusses how males have traded a profound sense of loneliness, emptiness and disconnection for success in the outside world in his 2011 book Lonely at the Top. Men frequently insist on handling their issues alone, which makes them less likely to be successful or even overcome difficulties that could have been taken more simply with assistance. When women feel a sense of void in them, the first thing they do is communicate the need for some space and alone time to their partners.

Men, on the other hand, become distant without communicating in any shape or form - while we understand where they are coming from, it is also true that communication is critical in any relationship. No point in ghosting their loved ones out of the blue when it takes a few seconds to let their partners know that they need some time alone to pull themselves together. These things are more important than a box of chocolates.

Suggested Reading: World Chocolate Day: Study Shows Mumbai Tops In Online Chocolate Orders

Women feel special in a heartfelt conversation, in proper communication even when they are falling out of love with their partners, drifting naturally and starting a new dynamic in their relationship. Besides, sometimes “cheesy” romantic stuff - like a hug from behind, giving a pull into their partners’ arms when they are least expecting it, figuring out what books they like reading by checking their Instagram and other clues they leave behind, gifting them an early edition of that favourite novel - all these things count more special than just a box of perishable chocolates.

They would appreciate a gift like a curated playlist and the like - gifts which are worth their salt, instead of something which is not well thought of or executed, something which does not mean that much, something which is simply an afterthought.

The views expressed are the author's own.