Being Single Parent Is Not Easy! Let's Give Them Shoutout On Single Parents Day

Redefining the definition of family by defying society's norm that a happy family consists of a father, mother, and children is an arduous task in India. We are no different from other families, except one parent is doing the job of two. We dared to do what felt right for ourselves and our children regardless of "log kya kahenge'. If that is not commendable, I don’t know what is.

From breaking free from conventional social norms and stepping out of an unhappy marriage to rebuilding our lives physically and psychologically while trying to be the best parent to our children and facing numerous challenges and prejudices in society, our lives are no less than a battlefield. Of course, we have our fair share of bad days, but keep our heads high and go on. The source of our strength and resilience is our children.

We balance it all—career, parenting, and household chores. Some of us have help from family and friends, while others don’t. Yet we never fail to provide our children with the best possible life that we can because if we don't, who will?

Challenges Of Single Parents And Their Journey

Representing SheThePeople, I spoke to some of my single-parent friends, who shared with us their journey of being ">single parents.

"My journey is filled with ups and downs; half goes into healing and recovering myself and re-parenting myself, and the other half goes into parenting my son. Society might see us differently, but just like any other parent, I also face daily challenges getting him to do things and dealing with his mood swings and meltdowns. I deal with questions about his dad from him every day, which I answer most openly and honestly. My son and I are partners in crime. One thing I ensure is that no matter how much we fight, we sit and talk about it, and he expresses his feelings openly to me. Living with parents has helped me face a few challenges that I may not have done on my own," said Priya, a writer, and mother to an 8-year-old boy.

Shahana, a finance professional and mother of a 7-year-old boy, said, "I have been married and divorced twice. I have a son from my first marriage, and I have been the only parent he has known since his birth. I had just gotten over my ex-husband and gotten a handle on parenting my son alone when I had to get married again due to social taunts. That messed up my life big time and largely affected my son’s emotional health. So, this time I didn’t pay heed to society and stepped out of my abusive marriage. Thankfully, my parents have helped me big time in raising my son, giving me the space to establish a career for myself."

Manish, a corporate employee and dad to a 14-year-old girl, said, "The challenge of bringing up a girl child as a single father is more of a learning experience for the father. These things are only to be learned through experience and cannot be learned just off the net or from other people’s experiences. It teaches a good deal of patience and lots of love. Right from combing her hair to handling her tears to having a good open discussion on menstruation and sex, it’s a challenge to ensure that she feels comfortable talking about anything under the sun, which one would otherwise find difficult to fathom a girl talking to her father. This is one relationship that needs a lot of gentleness (to compensate for the missing parent) both physically and mentally. The rewards are a lot of hugs for a lifetime, and I can proudly say that the "best relationship between a man and a woman is between a father and his daughter."

"Raising a child as a single dad is no easy task. It is tough because, as men, we are not emotionally designed to nurture a child single-handedly. But I must say, I enjoyed the journey a lot. My divorce had left me brutally injured. Gaining my son’s custody further suffocated me with all the toxic fumes from my kith and kin. I found solace in friends who never judged me. And it is their faith in me that has helped me emerge as a fighter dad. I believe every twist and turn I witnessed in my life was meant to be, to give me blessings I had never imagined would be mine," said Cherry, a hotelier, and dad to a 14-year-old boy.

As a single mother of a 3-year-old daughter, I can relate to all these parents. I am taking this space to wish my fellow single parents out there a very happy Single Parents Day. Please know that your journey is nothing less than an inspiration to many. Much love to you and your children! Don't look at single parents through a judgmental lens; our journey has been tough, and it is easier to taboo it than to lend a helping hand. Don't treat us as outcasts, criticise our kids for having a single parent, or blame their disobedience on our parenting. They are normal children with a normal life. Correct their mistakes without prejudice. From Single Parents Day onward, let's be considerate towards single parents and give them a big shoutout.

Suggested Reading: These Three Single Mothers Drop Truth Bombs to SheThePeople