Weddings mean huge gatherings which means one gets to see their long distant relatives, some of them after years. Somehow the only thing most of them want to talk about is your height, which grew too much as per their understanding or did not grow at all. Then come the comments on your weight.
A day when you makes up their mind while dolling up for the big flashy event to raid the snack counters to the best of their abilities, the remarks like, "You should start watching your weight, Beta. You are too young to be this fat" just kills the mood. Here you are eyeing the butter chicken gravy slowly spilling over the naan in someone else's plate while some aunty you don't even remember being related to starts giving you tips on yoga.
What exactly crosses such people's minds when they see a relative after years and start making them feel so bad about themselves. For some of us, there are only so many ways such 'celebratory' nights can go. You either get pissed and load up on more food than you ever planned to eat, force a smile during family picture sessions and pray to god for the night to end before some other relative decides to comment on your weight.
Before you start to get all sad about your own situation, think about the bride for a second who is most probably sucking her tummy in while looking happy for the camera. She probably did not eat a single momo in the last six months because she was too scared to be the fat bride. Let alone family members, even her tailor gave a talk on how she should watch her weight till her wedding.
The worst part about being body shamed in desi households is that you can't get upset. People will tell you that their remarks stemmed out of their concern for your health because apparently every fat person is hiding hundred diseases in their flabs. Even most parents do not stop people from saying such things because they also really care about the health of their child. Like really. They also can't help but stress about your future wedding with your relatives. " Isko kon hi pasand karega?" But don't you get touchy and reveal the secrets from your DMs. That sort of stuff is not good for boasting at family events for obvious reasons.
Then there the cousins who almost compete with each other to hit you with the most unfunny joke about your weight. Lucky for you if you have got great cousins because most of the time they save you the trouble of acting like you can take a joke. They understand and even stop the torturous comedy special.
How to handle body shaming at weddings?
The only thing you can do to keep attending weddings with the most caring relatives in the world is to develop a thick skin for your thick skin. Own your body like you do in the company of your actually loving friends and family and flaunt those curves. When some aunty starts to lecture you on your weight, offer her a rasogulla to keep her mouth occupied. If you are brave enough to confront, do that too. Strike that pose and grin for the camera like you have nobody to answer to. Because you don't. Think of one and only one objective before entering the dangerous relative's zone, aka weddings, the buffet section. There will be several occasions when people will body shame you and you can fight all you want after stuffing face because that butter chicken waits for nobody.
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