"Badmouthing Ex Is A Big Red Flag," Reveals Study. Let's Explore Why

A recent survey by QuackQuack discussed the ultimate checklist for red and green flags in a relationship. 10,000 people who are currently dating from both metro and smaller cities between the ages of 20 and 35 took part in the poll. One of the biggest red flags that was highlighted on the survey was "badmouthing the ex." The survey revealed that 39% of women between the ages of 22 and 32 believed that talking trash about their ex was a big red flag.

A man badmouthing his ex is often the one who enjoys "women jokes" and "wife jokes." He thinks it’s funny and that most women are the cause of men’s misery, thus disrespecting women, including the girl that he is dating. If a man is praising you by putting down another woman, then he is raising a red flag. It reflects his misogynistic and low-grade mindset. If it is his ex today, what is the guarantee that it won’t be you tomorrow? In fact, 12% of the participants in the survey think so too.

Badmouthing Ex Is Red Flag

Of course, the woman could have been truly wrong, and something she did must have hurt the man deeply. But badmouthing her to another woman, calling her names, cursing her, verbally abusing her, and praising the current woman by putting down his ex isn’t the right way to go about it. Even if she had truly hurt him, isn’t it immoral to talk badly about someone who is not around to defend themselves? Doesn’t badmouthing one woman reflect how cheaply he thinks of women in general?

The man might think he’s wooing his current girl by praising her and putting down his ex, but what he really is doing is tarnishing his own image. I’ve personally met some men who talk badly about their ex right on the very first date. While I do understand that there is a probability of the woman being in the wrong, badmouthing her isn’t the right way to share his anguish. He can share his feelings about his past, but trash talking is a big no.

A man who badmouths his ex often dumps the entire blame on her and doesn’t take any responsibility for the failed relationship. He is convinced that he has been perfect in all ways, but his ex has destroyed the relationship. The study by QuackQuack also revealed that the women participants believed that the men who called their ex crazy would have been the reason behind their craziness.

We are all humans, and it’s normal for us to make mistakes. No one is perfect, but we need to be able to self-reflect and acknowledge where we have gone wrong or if we might have contributed to the failure of the relationship. I don’t mean to say that we need to beat ourselves up over a past relationship, but we need to analyse ourselves and take responsibility if something has not been perfect on our end. At the very least, we should understand that we might have been drawn to the wrong person. A man who holds his ex solely responsible for the failed relationship isn’t doing that, so how is it possible to take a relationship forward with him?

Since the ex is not around to narrate her side of the story, he has the luxury to talk badly about her all he wants and even make up some extra stuff about her. It’s impossible to verify certain claims, and so if he’s painting his ex as the biggest villain of his life, then there is a high probability that he is not a man with morals. Moreover, if a man is spending too much time badmouthing his ex and talking about her, it means he’s still not over her or that relationship. Either he is holding a grudge or he clearly hasn’t moved on. How can you get into a relationship with someone who has clearly not put the past behind them?

Suggested Reading: 30 Red Flags That Are Your Signals To Exit The Relationship NOW