At 27, I had two daughters, only to realise my life was collapsing, Story Of A Single Mother

Today I am a Single Mother Turned Therapist but when I was 21 I ran away to marry the man I loved. At 27 I had two beautiful daughters, only to realise my life was collapsing. He was a substance abuse victim, in spite of all the chances we got to make our marriage work it failed! I failed multiple times as a wife, daughter and daughter-in-law.

With all the courage, one night I decided to give it up, to give up on the toxic relationship. I decided this was not the future my kids will have.

My elder one was 15 and the younger one was 10 when we moved out. At 12:30am I left the house to start a new life with nothing at all. As they say," Empty pockets teaches you a million things."

It was difficult to survive as a single parent, to answer questions from everyone, to take the blame and to be financially independent. I was running a catering service business back then but it all shut down as I got into depression due to the major setback and sudden change in my life. I worked here and there for a while to cope with household expenses but I knew my mental health needed the most attention, if I heal only then my kids will have a better perspective to live. I started my journey of self healing in 2008 and ever since it became a career path, who thought life would take such a turn?

I worked here and there for a while to cope with household expenses but I knew my mental health needed the most attention, if I heal only then my kids will have a better perspective to live.

In the last 11 years, I have seen ups and downs, doubted myself as a parent because being a single mother isn't enough sometimes. But when I look at how old my daughter's are and how I am able to make a change in the society I feel proud of myself.

With experience I have learnt that people might only come to criticise, but it's within us to stand up for ourselves and love ourselves enough even when it doesn't feel enough.

After a decade of being a Single parent, entrepreneur as a Counselor, Alternative Therapist and a Tarot Card reader I have helped hundreds of students and families get their way back home, find meaning to life and love themselves first.

This journey has been difficult and it always will be because when I lost my husband two years ago, it shattered us! We were separated but kids always knew they had someone to back upon, to call and complain, to have mid night coffee with if not me or go on secret movie dates. But 2019 devastated all of us. We went through terrible situations. We started 2020 without a shelter and lived at my mom’s till we found one. But, what didn't stop was the growth,

I decided to start a support group for mid-aged women who can come together and share their stories, along with that I started cooking again! Yes, it feels so good. The three of us served people free food when the COVID-19 situation got really bad. We didn't stop there, my younger one dared to dream and took a step towards her career, she flew to Canada to pursue her degree. My elder one has been my strongest support system since day one and helped me, we are getting closer and better.

What I learnt from my experiences was, yes, love might not be enough, yes love might not run your house, your career, or save your relationship. But fortunately or unfortunately love is the only one that HEALS!

 Bansari Bhagat is an Alternative Therapist and Counselor. The views expressed are the author's own.