Why Can't Women Be Chivalrous Too?

On a special date night, my partner treated me with full respect as he pulled out chairs and opened doors for me. This is not the first time that I have come across chivalrous behaviour. A friend of mine has however remained extremely opinionated about the idea of only men being chivalrous. I never quite agreed with her but I didn't deny either because who doesn't like being treated with respect? 

Chivalry as a concept

Chivalry is an archaic concept. It initially defined how a knight must behave. Later, it began signifying the respectful behaviour of men towards women. The word or the behaviour belongs to the age when women used to wear uncomfortable clothes which made it impossible to do normal chores. Moreover, women were considered weak at that time to actually perform anything on their own. So men, especially the knights or royal men, used to help them out and hence win their hearts. 

But today, the time has definitely changed. Women not only pull their chairs but also drive on their own. They no longer need a knight in shining armour to carry their bags. However, the acts of chivalry might change but the idea behind it must not die. Women in our society are rarely respected. They are harassed on the streets, in homes and even in schools and offices. If chivalry is practised by every man out there, women might feel safer. It is not necessary to open doors, pull chairs or carry bags to be chivalrous. The idea of chivalry is to respect women no matter what they wear, say or do. 

Why can't women be chivalrous? 

Why must the knight in shining armour be attributed to only a man? Why should chivalry be associated with men alone? Why can't women be chivalrous too? You must have heard many stories about women fighting in the guise of male knights on the battlefield. At that time, women couldn't do many things that men could. But today, women can be anything. Then why not chivalrous? 

Chivalry is about respecting others. So, what is wrong if women too help and respect men? If we see, women already do that. Many women in our society serve and respect men in their houses even at the cost of their own self-respect. But that's service, not chivalry. 

To consider women as chivalrous, we need to first see them as individuals who are capable of sustaining on their own. The basic idea of chivalry is to respect, be kind and help others. In no way should it undermine anybody's self-respect, abilities or individuality. 

I will sign off here with a small detail of a video I saw on Women's Day. A man was in the parking lot struggling to park his car. Then, a woman walked in and saw the man. She knocked at his car window and the man opened the window to answer. The woman said, "May I?" Very smoothly, she parked the man's car and handed back his keys. So, I ask again, why should chivalry be gendered? 

Views expressed are the author's own.