In Yet Another Divorce Story, We Jump To Call The Woman 'Bad Mom'

Following reports of their separation, Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner took to social media and confirmed their divorce. In a joint statement, they announced that they had chosen to part ways with a spirit of "amicability."

While several rumours circulated on the internet, Jonas and Turner explained that they had collectively decided to amicably conclude their union.

However, the media and a certain section of people have been reporting that not all was well in their paradise because of Turner's behaviour. Reports read, "She likes to party, he likes to stay at home. They have very different lifestyles." It has also been alleged that Joe Jonas has been taking care of their two children "pretty much all the time over the past three months, even while on tours. Basically, a section of people has been blaming Sophie Turner for "partying" all the time and hence for being a "bad mother," which has eventually led to her divorce from Joe Jonas.

Sophie Turner Blamed For Divorce

Blaming women for divorce is certainly not new, but it’s greatly distressing to see that women have been turned into "villains" for aeons now. The moment a woman dares to defy social norms (does almost anything other than caregiving), society begins blaming her for not being "good enough."

Isn’t the media too quick to spread news without paying attention to the facts? Thanks to social media, fans have come to Sophie Turner’s defence. An old video of the couple resurfaced where Joe Jonas himself says Sophie Turner is the "homebody" in the relationship. In another video that was released during the 2020 lockdown, Tuner identifies herself as an introvert who wishes to stay home all day. On the other hand, she said that Joe was the "real social butterfly."

Despite all these "facts", the news of Jonas and Turner’s divorce has spun the narrative. A part of the media and society have resorted to pinning the blame on the woman without actually knowing anything at all. Would it have happened if it was the other way around? Mostly not, considering that a woman’s primary role in life is perceived to be caregiving and nurturing even to this day.

This is quite clear from Joe Jonas making headlines for "taking care of his babies." Well, those are his children, and he’s taking care of them. What's wrong with a father taking care of his children all the time, most of the time, or even during his work hours? Why is that being made a big deal when mothers have been doing the same for centuries?

So, what if Turner really is partying? An X user named @bymickaudrey said, "She worked the whole of her teen years and young adulthood and then immediately got married and had two kids. Let the girl have some cocktails and night outs."

An Instagram user named Sidraqasim shared that last year she was planning to visit South Korea for work-related reasons when her child was 1.5 years old. "During a family argument, I was told that if you leave your 1.5-year-old daughter for 2 weeks for a business trip, you can leave her once and for all!" As a new mom, she was heartbroken; however, over the years, she realised that no matter what we do, it’s never enough for them."

This takes me back to my own past. As a new mother, I was under the radar for choosing divorce over tolerating a toxic marriage. I was blamed for being a bad mother who was ruining her baby’s life by separating from the biological father. I was advised to adjust and compromise for the sake of my child. But where was I in the picture? Why didn’t my well-being and happiness matter? Did that all vanish the minute I became a mother?

Over the years, I have learned to grow thick skin and make my own decisions. Despite what society perceives of me, I’ve begun prioritising myself over everything else. That might sound selfish, but if I’m not doing okay, how will I raise my child? If I don’t take care of myself, no one else will! So, there’s nothing to feel guilty about mothers prioritising themselves first—in fact, they should, because becoming a mother doesn’t kill the individual inside someone. That individual deserves to be taken care of!

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Views expressed by the author are their own