Why Empowering Schools For Sex Education Should Be A Requisite

In a shocking revelation, a teacher at Bryntirion Comprehensive in Bridgend, UK said that boys of 14 years old have been asking her how to choke girls during sex. Dr Tamasine Preece is the lead of the school's health and well-being curriculum. However, when she encountered such queries from young students, she was compelled to think what could be the reason behind this. What should she answer? 

Dr Preece said that children think choking girls was a normal part of the sex, she revealed to BBC. They said that "a soft squeeze on the neck is OK". Some students even asked, ''How can I choke someone safely?''. 

Dr Preece further told BBC that children think girls like to be choked during sex. "I’ve certainly been told by some children that they think that girls really want to be choked - with one saying girls are mad for it," she said. 

How Dr Preece inculcates a stigma-free environment during sex education

Dr Preece encourages open conversations in the class and teaches children about the importance of consent throughout the sex. Rather than blindly believing in things (like choking), Dr Preece asks children to discuss with her and their parents. 

She said, "Rather than just choking specifically we talk about the fact there should be no abuse of any kind in sexual relationships." 

Talking about the need to discuss sex with children rather than making them use technology, Dr Preece said, "We can shy away from these issues or we can be realistic that they’re happening and making sure that we’re the ones having conversations with our children rather than leaving it to tech companies."

How pornography creates myths about sex

This conversation with BBC shows how the lack of sex education leads to myths that are not only wrong but also fatal. The myths about sex mainly come from pornography that depicts unrealistic representations of sex. The choreographed sex of porn aiming at stimulating the consumers unknowingly become the breeding ground of unhealthy sex. 

Myths like choking women during sex make young consumers blindly believe in them. But why does the young population resort to pornography at an early age? Why does it blindly believe in whatever the porn shows? The only answer is the lack of sex education. 

The need for sex education among children

The young population, especially teenagers, are at the stage when their curiosity for sex is at its peak. The curiosity regarding genitals, gender and sex, peer pressure, the influence of TV, the internet and more contribute to the increased eagerness to explore sexual behaviour. In fact, as per studies, children start exhibiting sexual behaviours at the age of six or seven. 

If children are not taught about healthy sex at an early age, they will fall into the trap of unhealthy sexual development. They will resort to pornography to pacify their eagerness and hence internalise its fiction. Because of the silence around sex and sexual development in the home and school, children indulge in peer discussions about sex which again gives them a false picture of sex.  

Ultimately, this leads to grave consequences that we never anticipated. Just like the questions Dr Preece encountered. Just imagine what if the students didn't ask this question and directly applied it to their partner blindly believing in what they saw on the internet. Who will be responsible for the loss incurred? 

Many cases are reported in which boys watch porn and rape girls, sometimes their own sisters, to explore sex and sexual behaviour. Who is responsible for all this? 

As Dr Preece said encouraging open conversation among children about sex is crucial to learning healthy sexual behaviour. Similarly, schools must include sex education in their curriculum so that the stigma and fog around sex can be cleared. Sex education must not be just on paper. It should create an environment where children feel free to talk about sex. 

Not just schools, but homes too should be open to sex talks. Parents must not hesitate in educating their children about sex. Breaking a moment of hesitation is easier than answering questions about the consequences of unhealthy sexual development. 

Remember the movie OMG 2? Pankaj Tripathi's son indulges in unhealthy sexual practices which ultimately affects his own health. If Tripathi had educated his son about masturbation or if the school had taught boys about healthy sexual behaviour, things wouldn't have turned that ugly. But that was a film with a happy ending. But life is not a film. It can have bad endings. So we need to take steps to avoid the bad endings before it is too late. 

Views expressed are the author's own.