Silent Cry Of Students: My Journey Through Pressured Lanes Of Kota

Rajasthan's Kota, a city known as the educational hub of the country, lies a dark underbelly that often goes unnoticed amid the billboards selling dreams of success. The haunting echoes of yet another suicide resonated through the corridors of Kota, leaving the city grappling with a harsh reality—the 30th suicide by a coaching student lately in 2023-2024.

Yet another IIT student was found dead in Kota. A resident of Jharkhand, Shubh Choudhary had been studying for JEE-Mains for the past two years. This tragic incident comes after an 18-year-old JEE aspirant Niharika died by suicide earlier this year, two days before she was going to take her examination. She hanged herself in the room of her house in the Shiksha Nagri of Kota. Niharika left a suicide note which the police recovered. The note read, "Mummy and Papa, I can't do JEE. So, I am committing suicide. I am a loser. I am the reason. I am the worst daughter. Sorry, Mummy and Papa. This is the last option." 

In 2023, Nisha Yadav, a 21-year-old NEET aspirant, succumbed to immense pressure, casting a shadow over the relentless pursuit of academic success. As a former student who spent two years in Kota preparing for the same exam, I can't help but reflect on the city's unrelenting academic pressure and its toll on young minds.

Nisha, a promising young student preparing for the National Eligibility cum Entrance Test, met a tragic end by hanging herself from a ceiling fan. The absence of a suicide note has left her grieving family grappling for answers. The incident unfolded when her father's attempts to reach her went unanswered, prompting hostel staff to discover the devastating scene.

Kota Police have initiated a probe into the circumstances leading to Nisha's death. Shockingly, it was revealed that the anti-hanging device, mandated by the district administration, was not installed in Nisha's room, raising concerns about safety measures in coaching hostels.

The Disturbing Statistics

Adding fuel to the fire, the Kota district administration has issued a notice to Motion Coaching Institute for failing to report the severe depression of a 20-year-old NEET aspirant who recently took his own life. This violation highlights the dire need for better mental health support within coaching institutions.

According to police records, this year alone has witnessed 29 suicides among students preparing for competitive exams, the highest since 2015. The toll has reached 20 in the first eight months of 2023 alone, matching the total number of student suicides in 2018.

The Blame Game: Courts, Coaching Institutes, and Parents

While the Kota district administration holds coaching centres accountable for their failure to report severe cases of depression, the Supreme Court places the blame squarely on parents.

Refusing to hear a petition seeking regulation of private coaching institutes and a law establishing minimum standards, a bench led by Justice Sanjiv Khanna stated, “The problem is of parents and not of coaching institutes. Suicides are not happening because of the coaching institutes. They happen because the children cannot meet the expectations of their parents. The number of deaths could be much higher.”

The court's refusal to regulate private coaching institutes prompts a deeper reflection on the root causes of this crisis.

Kota's Educational Pressure Cooker

The toll is particularly alarming in a city like Kota, which boasts an annual revenue of ₹5,000 crore from hosting Joint Entrance Examination (JEE) and National Eligibility cum Entrance Test (NEET) aspirants. Tall billboards boasting success stories pepper the city, creating an atmosphere of cutthroat competition.

A staggering 93% of students are aware of only seven career options, perpetuating the pressure to pursue traditional paths like medicine and engineering. The unawareness of alternative career routes coupled with intense familial expectations, contributes to the ongoing crisis.

The problem in Kota is multifaceted—a toxic combination of parental expectations, limited career awareness, and relentless competition in coaching centres. The relentless 12-hour daily schedules, weekly tests, and constant pressure to excel create an environment where students are trapped in a high-stakes race for success. The societal pressure to pursue traditional careers further exacerbates the mental health challenges faced by these young minds.  A recent survey indicates that four out of ten students in Kota grapple with mental health issues such as depression, shedding light on the underlying mental health crisis.

The pressure-cooker environment fueled by intense competition and parental expectations has turned Kota into a battleground for young minds.

A Decade Later: From Aspirant to Storyteller

Almost a decade ago, as a 15-year-old girl with dreams of becoming a doctor, I stepped into Kota to prepare for the NEET exam. The city touted as an educational mecca, presented a harsh reality from the beginning. Labels dictate our place in the hierarchy, and students are divided based on percentiles, fostering an environment where only the 'top scorers' receive the attention and resources they need, amplifying the struggles of those deemed 'average.'  Struggling to find my footing in the middle percentile, the pressure to excel overshadowed the joy of learning, and I found myself lost in the pursuit of a coveted seat in the premium section.

The Kota routine was unforgiving—classes from dawn to dusk, doubt sessions in the evening, and a minimum of eight hours of solitary study. The pressure to excel often led to sacrificing meals, sleep, and the joys of everyday life. The singular goal was to forget everything else and concentrate on being an investment that parents could be proud of.

Rather than serving as inspiration, the toppers became a source of fear. The competitive culture, the endless comparisons, and the constant reminder that only toppers are remembered took a toll on my mental well-being. Amid the race, the pressure, and the homesickness, I found solace in writing. What began as scribbles on the side of study notes evolved into a diary of personal thoughts. Writing became my refuge, a source of peace amid relentless academic pressure.

The turning point came when a newspaper article narrated the tragic suicide of a girl my age, preparing for the same exam. It made me question if I, too, could have become a statistic, lost in the narrative of pressure and despair. Realizing the importance of pursuing what brings inner peace, I decided to make writing my passion and profession.

Three months later, I mustered the courage to tell my mother about my decision to pursue journalism instead of a medical career. Contrary to my fears, I found relief in her eyes. It dawned on me that children are not investments; they are treasures. In its toughest moments, Kota taught me to embrace what I believe in and stand out in my way.

As a journalist now, I reflect on Kota's paradox—a city that both shaped me and took a toll on the lives of many aspiring students. The statistics of suicides don't capture the dreams and hopes that remain unexplored and unspoken. Today, beyond being a journalist,  my perspective is not just that of an observer. It's a journey back to the city that shaped me, albeit through the toughest moments. The tragedy of Nisha Yadav and countless others reminds us that dreams, hopes, and aspirations deserve more than mere statistics.

As I reflect on my journey and the haunting statistics, I implore parents, educators, and policymakers to reassess the price we pay for success. It's time to prioritize mental health over percentile rankings, nurture dreams beyond the academic race, and reshape Kota into a city that builds futures rather than shattering them.

To those reading this, I want to say that it's okay not to be the topper and not to meet societal expectations. You are more than a statistic; you are a lifetime story. Kota's culture may teach you that cracking an exam makes you the story, but in reality, your journey, struggles, and dreams make you a story worth living every day.

Views expressed are the author's own.