Kenyan Women Embrace Roses During A 'Dark Valentine' Vigil—But Why?

When the world celebrated Valentine's Day with the traditional exchange of flowers and chocolates, Kenyan women, clad in black, stood in stark contrast solemnly, clutching lit candles and crimson roses to honor more than 30 women brutally murdered in the country. The "Dark Valentine" vigil, orchestrated by the End Femicide Kenya Movement, echoed through the heart of Nairobi and resonated in six other cities, highlighting the alarming surge in femicide cases that have gripped the nation.

Kenya, like a lot of South African societies, is grappling with the violent effects of patriarchy. The heinous killing of a young Kenyan woman in a temporary rental dwelling has incited widespread anger and outrage on social media. #StopKillingWomen is trending on X, and a lot of organisations and activists have taken to their social media to remind the world of the perpetuating misogyny that is claiming the lives of women. In the most recent case, a young woman was brutally dismembered, and her body parts were forcibly placed into a plastic bag. Police are investigating. The case has left Amnesty International Kenya executive director Irungu Houghton feeling "shocked and outraged." He said, “Another woman in her 20s who will not get to see her 40s.”

Dark Valentine: A Call for Change

The End Femicide Kenya Movement, comprising more than 1,000 organizations and individuals, orchestrated this poignant event, echoing impassioned calls for action and featuring musical performances. 

"Flowers are not beautiful on a casket," declares a message in Swahili on the shirts worn by the mourners, encapsulating the gravity of the situation. The vigils aim to exert pressure on the government, demanding the declaration of femicide and violence against women as a national emergency.

The vigils follow massive nationwide marches in January, where 20,000 Kenyans demanded government intervention against sexual and gender-based violence and femicide, often overlooked societal issues.

Women Blamed For Their Own Misery 

This happened weeks after the horrific killing of popular socialite Starlet Wahu, which had startled the internet. Misogynistic comments bombarded social media, with men blaming women and targeting them by saying they ‘invited’ their deaths. Targeting sex workers and prostitutes, men reduced these women as deserving of whatever was happening to them as they were trading their bodies for money. 

These murders are being called Airbnb murders in Kenya. Gender-based violence is a major concern in South African nations, and Kenya is no exception. From female genital mutilation to murder and assault, Kenya is one of the countries with the highest rates of female homicides and female abuse. 

At least 34% of women said they had experienced physical violence, according to a national survey in 2022. A report titled Homicide Country Data, released in 2022 by the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime, states that 706 cases of femicide, or 2.64  cases per 100,000 women, occurred in Kenya in 2021.

Startling figures from the Africa Data Hub reveal that husbands and boyfriends, not strangers, are responsible for two-thirds of women's murders in Kenya. The movement's statement captures the haunting question that many Kenyan women face: "Where do we go when home is where we could be killed?"

Why #StopKillingWomen? 

The recent killings have shed light on the ignored misogyny and patriarchal violence meted out to women in Kenya. This misogyny is expressed in the so-called "manosphere,” where men trash women and victim-blaming is the mantra. It's a public space created to target feminists and activists, promoting masculinity and male chauvinism.

In response to such slandering, "STOP KILLING WOMEN" began trending in Kenya on X. Women on social media, alongside activists and other organisations, are calling men out for their patriarchy and the alarming rate of femicide, rooted in male chauvinism and victim-blaming. It’s not the occupation that’s killing women, it’s the patriarchal mindset that perpetuates gender-based violence. 

Kenyan MP Esther Passaris also echoed the same. She also recalled how she is called a ‘prostitute’ and is a subject of such derogatory language, solely because of her gender. 

The killings connote the larger idea of “woman-hating” that emanates from hypermasculinity. The fact that patriarchy subordinates women allows men to feel that their actions, no matter what, are always justified. Killing women is a way to “educate” women to know their limits and boundaries or bear the consequences. 

Onyango Otieno, a 35-year-old activist and mental health advocate, has surmised this beautifully. He says, “The world has evolved in so many ways. Men have not. The way this violence has been systemized, there is a deep devilish bestiality about it.”

Feminist activist, Njeri Migwi said, "Everyone has an unalienable right to life and NOT be killed. We will NOT be debating the sanctity of life. Your morals, or lack thereof, don't dictate why a woman should be killed. Starlet Wahu should be here. The End. Rest in Power, Starlet!" Additionally, she said, “Four femicide cases, the reported ones. That's one murder every two days. This is a national crisis. We cannot be counting the number of women's bodies murdered and think this is a normal occurrence.”

Apart from the lack of awareness of their rights, survivors often encounter police reluctance to investigate cases of intimate partner violence, dismissing them as mere nuisances.

For those in poverty, pursuing justice becomes an arduous financial burden. Costs associated with public transportation, medical paperwork, and potential bribes for a police report create insurmountable hurdles. Survivors of sexual assault, in particular, face the additional challenge of obtaining a physical examination form, a costly process that many cannot afford, further hindering their ability to document their cases.

An organisation named Feminists in Kenya said, “Such attitudes are unacceptable and contribute to a dangerous culture of violence against women. In calling for accountability, we recognise the inadequacies of Kenya's criminal justice system to effectively provide redress to survivors and victims. We urge all relevant institutions to take necessary and urgent steps in safeguarding women's constitutional right to life.”

Publisher and podcaster Wayua Muli said: "Let’s just STOP blaming AirBnBs for femicide. Neither the hosts nor the app are responsible for the murders of women who use them. The buck stops with the men who CHOOSE to kill these women, and all who fuel this rabid misogyny!"

A lot of women and organisations have taken to their social media to express solidarity and are rallying for change. 

Enough Is Enough!

Beyond the flowers and chocolates of Valentine's Day lies a nation grappling with the dark realities of femicide, where justice remains elusive for many. The collective voice of the End Femicide Kenya Movement echoes not just in vigils but in a call to action, demanding a radical transformation of a justice system marred by neglect and denial.

Gender-based violence doesn’t have rationality. They are pregnant with biases and stereotypes. Women are murdered not because of their clothes or occupation. Women are murdered not because they are roaming the streets at night or dancing in a club. Women are murdered because of the patriarchal structure of society, which normalises the ostracization and stigmatisation of women. Period. 

Violence isn’t an isolated event; rather, it is further perpetuated by the biases of those in power, who are the puppeteers and dancers of the patriarchal rhythm of society.