Don't Dare Fat Shame A New Mom, They Go Through A Lot: Neha Dhupia

Actor, Model and former Miss India, Neha Dhupia has donned several hats throughout her career. Very recently she added another role to her kitty, that of a mother. SheThePeople sat with Neha Dupia as she shared with us, her experience of motherhood, more specifically as a working mom.

Neha Dhupia proves that she is no less than a wonder woman, when you get to know that she got back to work after just 10 days of delivery. When asked she says, “I think it was not very hard for me as I am very driven as a person.”

It is your choice

Neha Dhupia proves that she is no less than a wonder woman, when you get to know that she got back to work after just 10 days of delivery. When asked she says, “I think it was not very hard for me as I am very driven as a person.”

She further tells us, it was hard for her to wait even for the eight days she wasn’t working. “I was in midst of shooting #NofilterNeha Season 3. Just two hours after she was born, I was sending emails.” Neha further explains, “Having said that, I have 2000 percent respect for moms who stay at home and decide to do nothing and the same amount of respect for moms who go out and work.”

It is more demanding for women

As much as mothers like to spend time with their new-born babies, sometimes it almost becomes like a compulsion. In India, even today amidst the gender equality debate, when it comes to nurturing your children it is usually the mother who takes upon herself to always be there for her children no matter what.

“My husband and I, we try to be the flag bearers of gender equality on our level but in a lot of places it doesn’t happen."

While husbands have started taking responsibilities, In Neha’s words “it is more demanding for women.” She says, “My husband and I, we try to be the flag bearers of gender equality on our level but in a lot of places it doesn’t happen. Even when I was growing up my dad was a naval officer and my mom would work too. But when one of us was born, she had to leave her job and sit back at home. A lot changes. Initially you think you are doing the right thing by spending time with your children and later on you miss your life.” It is very important for women to not lose sight of who they are and what they can achieve.

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How to deal with guilt

Being a working mom doesn’t come that easy. You have to go through your fair share of guilt, of leaving your little kid behind as you leave for work. It is a clash between your choice as an individual and a conflict with the demands of motherhood. How does Neha Dupia deal with the guilt?

“It is heart-breaking to leave her behind. But the only way I see it, is that you have got to disconnect. You’ve got to compartmentalise."

“It is heart-breaking to leave her behind. But the only way I see it, is that you have got to disconnect. You’ve got to compartmentalise. We don’t have those many means that suddenly today I can say, I am going to sit at home, and I don’t wanna work.” She further adds, “I have big dreams for her. A lot can be sorted if I get up and go to work every day.  That is the only thing that keeps me away from the guilt.”

Fat-shaming and advice

Women face a lot of pressure to get back in shape after pregnancy and there’s a lot of fat-shaming involved. Neha comments, “When you get a knee injury everyone tells you to be careful and take pain killers, women go through so much why is nobody nursing that? Don’t you dare fat shame a new mom. They go through a lot.”

One final advice

What is the one advice she would like to give to new moms?

Neha says, “Get a lot of sleep. It is very important.”

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Snigdha Gupta is an intern with SheThePeople.Tv