Calling Unknown Women 'Darling' Is Offensive, Says Calcutta HC

Justice Jay Sengupta at Calcutta High Court has said that calling an unknown woman 'darling' is offensive under Sections 354A (outraging modesty of a woman) and 509 of the Indian Penal Code (IPC). The court made this judgement while hearing the plea of a man who allegedly addressed a female police constable as 'darling' while she was on duty. 

The man, Janak Ram, was in a drunken state when he used the sexually coloured remark. He has allegedly said, "kya darling, challan karne aayi hai kya? (Hi, darling, have you come to impose a fine?)".

Dissolving his plea, the court said that Indian society is not of the standards that a man can be "gleefully permitted" to use words such as 'darling' to address "unsuspecting, unacquainted women".

The judge said, "Addressing an unknown lady, whether a police constable or not, on the street by a man, drunken or not, with the word 'darling' is patently offensive, and the word used is essentially a sexually coloured remark."

Street Harassment of Women 

This judgement is remarkable because it picked up a very sensitive yet ignored issue in society. Street harassment of women is highly common in our country. Every woman in our society has to be 'careful' while she walks on the streets. You never know who might grope you, hold your hands, nudge using the elbow intentionally, play sexist songs or just pass lewd comments. No one asks these harassers to be mindful of their acts but rather expect women to ignore and protect themselves. 

As far as calling unknown women names is concerned, it is not just 'darling'; men use many other words that offend women who pass by them. For example- sweetheart, baby, janeman, chhamiya and whatnot. All these words are intended to objectify women and make them feel uncomfortable. As the court also said, these words are sexually coloured. They are permissible only in private conversations that too with the woman's consent. 

Men who use these words are well aware that they are sexually charged. But when these men are confronted, they outright deny it by saying that they were just complimenting the woman. Why don't they understand that complementing unknown women is not similar to making them uncomfortable? How can these words be 'compliments' if they make a woman feel as if she is naked in public? Shouldn't compliments make a woman feel good about herself? 

Men are never taught to respect women

The problem is that in our society men do not know how to respect women. They are never taught about treating women with equality and respect. Unknown women are assumed to be sexual objects because objectifying them will cause no harm to the men and the women in their families. But why is it difficult to understand that passing lewd comments is as hurting and offensive as any form of harassment? If one man does it unopposed, the other will join him too and this will automatically become a chain that will eventually get to the women in the families of the eveteasers. So for whose benefit are men still promoting this toxic behaviour of harassing women on the streets? If you are a man who is protective of the women in your house, how can you seek pleasure from the activity that makes women unsafe?   

Using cuss words derived from women

The judgement by the Calcutta High Court is remarkable also because it recognised how women can be harassed verbally too. In our society, all the cuss words are based on women. No matter if a woman is guilty of something or not, she is targeted by society using cuss words. But no one takes these verbal forms of harassment seriously. They are passed on as something done out of rage, lack of consciousness or even misery. What about the feeling that these words give women? What about the lasting mark it leaves in their minds? Is that not harassment? 

Stop normalising verbal harassment of women. It doesn't always take a knife to dig a wound in the body. Words too have claws that rip the skin. Men in our society need to start respecting every woman, known or unknown. Using sexual words to compliment unknown women is not how you respect a woman's autonomy. Compliment but in a way that the woman doesn't feel objectified or hurt. Moreover, stop pedalling cuss words based on women. Women have a name, identity and life that is way beyond the lewd words' definitions. So stop limiting women to the corners of your mind before you get confined within four walls of criminal offences.   
Views expressed are the author's own.