MP Calls 'Live-In' A Disease: Politicians Must Move Past This Already

A BJP MP from Haryana is making headlines for calling live-in relationships a "disease" spreading from Western countries and ruining Indian culture. He has demanded that the government should make a law against such relationships. The MP, Dharambir Singh, has also said that love marriages are the reason why divorce rates are increasing in India, And so, he has suggested encouraging arranged marriages in our country. 

During the zero hour of the Parliament session, Singh said, "I want to bring to the notice of the government and Parliament a very serious issue. Indian culture is known for its philosophy of 'Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam (the world is one family) and brotherhood. Our social fabric is different from others in the world. The whole world is impressed by our unity in diversity."

MP Calls Live-In Relationship A Disease

According to Singh, arranged marriages are India's long tradition. It not only has the consent of the groom and bride but also keeps in mind several factors like social and individual values and likes as well as family backgrounds. Talking about divorce, he pointed out that marriages in India are relationships tied for seven births. The divorce rate in our country is low- 1.1. per cent- compared to other countries which have rates as high as 40 per cent. He concluded from this that arranged marriages have the lowest divorce rates. 

However, he alleged, that in recent times divorce rate has been increasing and the reason is love marriage. 

"Therefore, it is my suggestion that the consent of the mother and father of the bride and groom be made mandatory in love marriages because, in large parts of the country, marriage does not happen in the same 'gotra' and due to love marriages, there are a lot of conflicts in the villages. Scores of families are destroyed in these conflicts, therefore the consent of both the families is important," he said.

Talking about live-in relationships, Singh said, it is a "new disease" and a social evil spreading in our country. Bringing to light the case of Shraddha Walker and Aftab Poonawala, Singh said that such cases are on the rise in our country. 

"Not only this is ruining our culture but also hatred and evils are spreading in the society. If this continues our culture will die and there will be no difference between us and others," he said.

Therefore, he suggested, "I request the minister that a law be made against live-in relationships so that this dangerous disease can be eradicated from society."

When Law Says Live-In Relationships Are Not Criminal In Nature, Then Why The Debate?

But why are we still debating about the relevance of live-in relationships and love marriages when they are allowed by law by all means? Why are our ministers hell-bent on criticising such relationships when the court has clearly said that every individual has the right to choose their partner? 

In September itself, the Delhi High Court said that a live-in relationship between two consenting adults is not criminal and so courts cannot impose their perceptions of morality on such couples. Moreover, the Supreme Court of India’s recent judgment in 2022 said unmarried couples and queer couples may be an atypical manifestation of the family but they are as real as traditional families.

Cases of divorce or murders within such relationships are not exclusionary. They can happen in any relationship that is not based on the right mindset. Let us not ignore that many arranged marriages are not happy because they have familial pressures. Couples stay in toxic relationships just because their families do not allow them to separate.

It is okay to call marriages sacred. However, it is not okay to define sacredness based on a single perspective. If marriage is sacred, it is so for any marriage across caste, culture and religion.

There are other important topics to debate about. Let's focus on that. For starters, why is the domestic violence rate higher than the divorce rate in our country?

Views expressed are the author's own.