And It's Begun. I Said Hello To Menopause

Embarking on my voyage into menopause, I've recently celebrated my 47th birthday. I count myself fortunate as physically, this transition has been reasonably bearable largely due to my overall wellness. But on an emotional plane, it's been a tougher battle, particularly with feelings of remorse creeping in. A successful professional, my career has always been my focal point. 

Still single, I find myself straying from the norm of women in my age group here in India. Over the years, I've noticed a cyclic trend among my female co-workers: love enters their lives, leading to matrimony and eventually, motherhood, each step gradually drawing them away from their professional ambitions. It's noteworthy that even when these women share their personal lives with someone from the same professional background, it's usually the woman who retreats from her career to tend to family life. 

My tryst with menopause

Although I've always been at peace with the life course I chose for myself, gradually, a sense of regret over what might have been has started to loom over me. Quips about women pushing motherhood into their forties had me believing I had all the time in the world. Somewhat innocently, I overlooked the fact that my biological clock was ticking. As my monthly cycles started changing, the ghost of regret began to haunt me. Given a life filled with remarkable experiences and travel, it seems almost trivial to harbor such feelings. Opting for counseling – a privilege I feel thankful for, has been vital in helping me navigate these emotional complexities. 

Every now and then, I daydream about taking time off from my relentless work commitments. Nonetheless, I consistently remind myself that my life’s choices were conscious and empowering. After all, my worth is not predicated on having a partner or a child.

I remain optimistic about encountering someone share my life with, even exploring the idea of adoption. In the end, I am consciously creating room for myself to navigate this feeling of 'loss' - a term I prefer over regret.

This sentiment reverberates with my unique wisdom in my 47th year of life.

Views expressed by the author are their own