It's official, women are getting over the idea of dating and the eventual cycle of joy and heartbreak, at least for now. TikTok trend boysober' encourages women to give up 'toxic' relationships that disrupt their inner peace and exchange it for a period of healthy and cleansing self-development. Marriage, soulmates, boys, and sex, are out for an entire year, serenity is in.
What is boysober trend?
The trend is likely triggered by the modern dating scenario, fueled by dating apps and the problematic personalities that social media sometimes makes us adopt. The term was coined by an American comedian Hope Woodard, who describes a movement wherein women in their 20s keep their lives unsullied from 'toxic' men and dating habits. It kicks out manipulation, emotional abuse, jealousy, and the temporary validation received in a relationship, all out of the door inviting inner peace, composure, and wholesomeness to guide these 'love-drunk' women through the best years of their lives.
Woodard describes it as, ''removing the fake sense of validation that we get from dating and situations sleeping around, and refocusing that energy”, according to an article by The Independent.
Interpretations
A lot of people have compared the trend to celibacy. However, celibacy generally preaches the values of purity and virginity, whereas the 'boy sober' trend is more toward trading in negative experiences and habits for a rejuvenated soul. It is sort of like a juice cleanse but for your dating life. Though both the trend and celibacy are personal choices, 'boy sober' does not encourage giving up an individual's sensuality but rather transforms its overused and somewhat intoxicated state into something more positive.
Though Woodard had said that the term is not gender-specific, the general interpretation that exists on social media, and the one that has received the most traction, is that it refers to women who are tired of dating men. It essentially indicates that prolonged and repeated dating is as dangerous as alcoholism in the modern world.
''Boy sober'' has also been seen as the opposite of ''boy crazy'', condemning hook-up culture and the search for constant romantic validation. Introspection and 'figuring stuff out' is the backbone of the movement. Practising romantic sobriety instead of jumping into relationships that may ultimately prove to be unfulfilling may just be the secret to emotional and spiritual nirvana that we all need.
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