Seems Like Everyone Knows How To Raise Your Kid Better Than You

Indian Tennis player Sania Mirza got trolled online by Pakistani cricket fans, for their cricket team’s defeat at hands of team India. In a viral video Mirza can be seen having dinner with her cricketer husband Shoaib Malik and other team members the night before the match they lost. A part of the blame for the team's lack of consciousness towards fitness has thus found its way to Mirza, because naturally, we need a woman to bear the blame for every misstep or misfortune on a man’s part. Didn’t our fellow countrymen do the same to Anushka Sharma a few years ago, when her then boyfriend Virat Kohli was in a bad form? But apart from being trolled, Mirza also had to deal with some unsolicited advice on motherhood.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• A video of team Pakistan along with Sania Mirza partying the night before the World Cup match with India has gone viral.
• Veena Malik lectured Sania Mirza on how taking her child to a sheesha bar was harmful to his health.
• However, Mirza clarified that her child didn't accompany them.
• Why do we fail to trust a mother with knowing what is best for her child?

A part of the blame for the Team Pakistan's defeat at hands of Indian cricket team in World Cup has found its way to Mirza, because naturally, we need a woman to bear the blame for every misstep or misfortune on a man’s part.

It was rumoured that Mirza and Malik’s young son had also accompanied them on this outing. Without confirming any facts, or personally reaching out to Mirza, Pakistani actor Veena Malik took it upon herself to offer some advice to Mirza as to how taking a child to a sheesha lounge was hazardous to his health. “Sania, I am actually so worried for the kid. You guys took him to a sheesha place isn't it Hazardous? Also as far as I know Archie's is all about junk food which isn't good for athletes/Boys. You must know well as you are mother and athlete yourself?” she tweeted.

Veena,I hav not taken my kid to a sheesha place. Not that it’s any of your or the rest of the world’s business cause I think I care bout my son a lot more than anyone else does :) secondly I am not Pakistan cricket team’s dietician nor am I their mother or principal or teacher- https://t.co/R4lXSm794B

— Sania Mirza (@MirzaSania) June 17, 2019

To know when they sleep,wake up and eat ..
thank you for your concern though .. means a lot ✌🏽 https://t.co/R4lXSm794B

— Sania Mirza (@MirzaSania) June 17, 2019

But Mirza wasn’t going to take this lying down. She clarified that firstly she didn’t take her son to a sheesha place, and second, that she could take care of her son very well. “Veena, I have not taken my kid to a sheesha place. Not that it’s any of your or the rest of the world’s business cause I think I care about my son a lot more than anyone else does :) secondly I am not Pakistan cricket team’s dietician nor am I their mother or principal or teacher to know when they sleep, wake up and eat .. thank you for your concern though .. means a lot,” she replied.

Every mother knows what is best for her child, or let me rephrase that, every mother learns what is best for her child. Isn’t it a trial and error method?

Mirza is not alone though, mothers across the world have to endure unnecessary tirades from even complete strangers, as everyone seems to have a lot to say on how they should be bringing up their kid. From other moms to know-it-all men, the world is full of people who have a better “suggestion” for you, than what your experience taught you. Be it what children should be wearing in which weather, to what they should be eating, or when they should be left in someone else’s care or not, parenting is a process which is unique for every parent and their children. Every mother knows what is best for her child, or let me rephrase that; every mother learns what is best for her child. Isn’t it a trial and error method? Also, while we all may have different sensibilities, but beyond them all mums have a common aim; the well-being of our children.

Which means that every move that we make as a mom, every small and big decision we take, is backed by the intent of giving our child a happy and healthy upbringing. Thus, people should stop thinking that they know what is better for a child than his or her own mother does. Wouldn’t Sania know that it was harmful to take a child to a sheesha lounge? Did she take him? No, but since there was a rumour that she did, Veena began to lecture her on child safety, instead of having the courtesy to at least clarify the situation first. This is the level of distrust people show in moms and their instincts, and it is universal.

Does it mean that mums do not want advice at all? Ofcourse not, but the key word here is “want.” Motherhood comes with it own set of challenges and lessons and we all need help to wade through them. But if mums need any help, they will and they should ask for it. Unnecessary advice only clouds their judgment. So, unless they ask, don't dole out your expertise for free.

Picture Credit: Sania Mirza / Instagram

Also Read: Why Does Single Parenting Still Meet Resistance From Our Society?

Yamini Pustake Bhalerao is a writer with the SheThePeople team, in the Opinions section. The views expressed are author’s own.