Dear Akshay Kumar, Please Don't Undermine The Journey Of Motherhood

So, we have superstar Akshay Kumar urging us to be “product of mother nature not a product of a product” nothing wrong in that tweet, he is talking about leading a life without supplements and to go natural and organic. He knows best he is a health freak and he is obviously flaunting his perfect physique. But I have a problem with the second part of the tweet where he says “trust me, I am a father of two.” In other words he’s saying he has been able to maintain his body despite being a father of two. Well, of course he’s a father of two but what was his contribution in bringing those two kids into this world? Other than the obvious contribution of a man what other physical, emotional, hormonal changes did he undergo in those nine months? A woman replying to his tweet rightly said “Dear Father of 2, Get pregnant. Carry the child for the entire term. Give birth. Get back into shape. Do it all again for the 2nd child. Then say, father of 2.”  Is he talking about dad bod, what’s that I say!

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

• Akshay Kumar flaunts his perfect physique tweeting about eating all things natural and organic.
• But he also adds “trust me, I am a father of two.” In other words, he’s saying he has been able to maintain his body despite being a father of two. 
• What was his contribution in bringing those two kids into this world? Did he carry the child for the entire term? Give birth?
• Men should not undermine and trivialise what women go through during pregnancy and childbirth.

Does he even know what pregnancy entails? Pregnancy is a time of great physical and emotional change for women. Everything from the size of her belly to the speed at which her heart beats changes over the nine months leading up to childbirth. As a result of hormonal fluctuations and the physical strain of carrying extra body weight, pregnant women rush to buy clothes two sizes bigger, search for ways to alleviate swollen ankles and gasp for breath after climbing a few stairs. Especially, during the second trimester the abdomen begins to expand and by the end of this trimester, the top of the uterus almost touches the rib cage. A pregnant woman’s abdomen may ache on one side or the other, as the abdominal wall and the ligaments that support the uterus are stretched too. These are but just a few changes. Fitness routines are far from a woman’s mind, let me tell you.

As a result of pregnancy women have stretch marks and gain extra weight (women gain anything between 17-20 kgs during pregnancy) among other things by the end of pregnancy, which takes ages for women to get them back to normal shape, or in some cases, the body doesn’t come back to normal at all. And women happily embrace this new body, which may not be considered a fit physique.  So, for women one kid or two, the body undergoes transformation with every pregnancy, therefore I am not able to understand this “I am a father of two” comment from a star, from a man. Do men even understand this phenomenon called pregnancy and childbirth?

Dear Father of 2,
Get pregnant.
Carry the child for the entire term.
Give birth.
Get back into shape.
Do it all again for the 2nd child.
Then say, father of 2.#JustSaying
BTW, nice physique 👍

— L (@larissafernand) September 11, 2019

So, for women one kid or two it doesn’t matter the body undergoes transformation, therefore I am not able to understand this “I am a father of two” comment from a star, from a man.

Also read: Tribute To An Officer Who Gave Me My First Lesson In Empowerment

There are so many restrictions put on pregnant women even if they are fighting fit and go to the gym everyday. Not everyone is a superwoman like Serena Williams who won a grand slam when she was pregnant. Even for someone like her she is now finding it difficult to regain her pre-pregnancy stature in the sport. And yes, she is fit and has the best sportswoman physique ever. Closer home we have Mary Kom, we should ask her how easy or difficult it was to get back to form after pregnancy. Or for that matter Sania Mirza. Not for nothing pregnancy and childbirth are called second birth for women, because we do not know what’s on the other side of these stages.

You did not carry your babies to full term, you never gained weight, you did not get stretch marks and did not experience the pain of childbirth.

Akshay please do not undermine and trivialise what women go through during pregnancy and childbirth. You did not carry your babies to full term, you never gained weight, you did not get stretch marks and did not experience the pain of childbirth. On top of it you were free to carry out your regular rigorous workout routines, eat what you wanted. Of course dads will have a physique like you provided they are not lazy and workout. But we women have to fight it out — to get our bodies back to shape after pregnancy.

As it is women are not given their due for taking up this life altering decision and for a star to say what he did will further trivialise the fact. And most importantly other men are listening and reading and they shouldn’t get the wrong idea now should they?

Also read: Patriarchy Ensures That Women Feel Small For Prioritising Themselves

Smita Singh is an editor with the SheThePeople.TV team. The views expressed are her own.