Mary Kom gives me hope

As my father bought four tickets for the Mary Kom biopic by the same name, a couple of days back, I announced I won’t watch it in protest because the movie, claims to celebrate a Manipuri boxer by casting a Punjabi former Miss World. I tried to stand my ground; for this summoned my wrath over not one, but two issues. The first- Glamorization of real women icons, which subsequently project success stories in the women's movement as the exception, not the rule. The second- repeated failure to acknowledge, tap and appreciate the north eastern pool of talent. I was mostly just laughed at, and eventually, dragged to the movie.

As I started to watch the movie, which confirmed all my fears- by overplaying, well, almost everything. But soon enough, it struck me how the 7-8 year old girl, sitting two seats away from mine, would receive this film.

When I was her age, nothing of the three issues the movie talked about, existed for me- the north-eastern states, women in sports and offbeat sports like boxing (since everything but cricket is an offbeat sport in our country.) As a young woman who still lives with her parents and constantly listens to relatives talk about how it’s time for her to get married; women like Mary Kom give me some hope.

Kom had nothing going for her apart from her passion for the sport. Yet, against all odds- she made it. Her marriage and her children, supposedly a woman's “primary responsibility,” did not strip her off the dreams she adorned, and the identity she aspired to create- which personally terrifies me much more than I can express right now.

We, as young girls, grow up listening to stories about how we can achieve anything we want professionally. But as the years pass by, we begin to realize how we have to constantly justify our actions and choices to ourselves and the society, with learning to balance everything perfectly –the little detail our teachers and parents forgot to mention.

I think most women give up because they get tired of playing a hundred roles every day. Especially living with the guilt of “leaving the kids” to fulfill their "own selfish dreams.” (I don’t know how anyone can justify putting these two words together- “selfish dreams.”)  But seeing married women with children, like Kom, go fiercely after what they want is almost like ‘Chicken soup for a young feminist’s soul.’ And with icons like our female Manipuri sportsperson in the picture, I can at least hope that the little 7-8 year old girl I saw will be less terrified than me, when she is my age.