The best thing about a best friend is that they understand you without having to say a lot. And this holds both ways. With your bestie your understanding is such that you are able to pick up from where you left even if professionally and geographically you both are at very different places. But that one phone call or that WhatsApp message is enough for you to know that you have someone watching your back. And you will cross continents to meet each other.
Key Takeaways
- Sometimes, people we are really fond of often turn out to be more damaging not just to our mental health, but our overall wellbeing.
- It takes time for us to realize that we are giving way more to this relationship than we are getting.
- The best way to judge whether a friendship is turning toxic is by being honest to ourselves.
It is also true that with time we all change, hence our expectations from a relationship also changes. So, friends drift apart. Sometimes they stay in touch as a social obligation and sometimes they let go of the connection, but there is no bad blood. However, we are all guilty of letting the wrong kind of people in our lives, people who gain a kind of emotional control over us which is difficult to get out of. It is not necessarily a romantic relationship, always. Sometimes, people we are really fond of often turn out to be more damaging not just to our mental health, but our overall wellbeing.
Also Read: Is It Okay To Cut Out Toxic Family Members From Our Lives?
This person can be a friend, a work colleague or a cousin you were once really fond of and without realising you become their emotional anchor. Remember that one friend your mother never liked and you always defended. The one who borrowed all your books and notes but never had the courtesy to return them. Or that work colleague who became your best friend on day one, but wouldn’t look you in the eye once you got a promotion and they didn’t. Remember how heartbroken you were when you realized who was behind all the office gossip that was doing the rounds. Or that cousin who borrowed your mobile phone to call their beloved every time they came visiting, and suddenly dropped off the Earth and got married, and you kept staring at their wedding invitation.
This person can be a friend, a work colleague or a cousin you were once really fond of and without realising you become their emotional anchor.
Also Read: What Toxic Friendships Can Teach Us About Ourselves
There definitely has been that one person in all our lives who has made us wonder, how did we let them in, in the first place. The sign of toxic friendship is such that they creep up upon us. It takes time for us to realize that we are giving way more to this relationship than we are getting. And in case of emotional investments the pain in letting go is way more than enduring it, that’s what we all believe. So, what do you do when there is no trust or respect left in the relationship?
There definitely has been that one person in all our lives where we have wondered, how did we let them in, in the first place.
The best way to judge whether a friendship is turning toxic is by being honest to ourselves. No one wants to go through an emotional trauma of losing a loved one. But if you are in a situation where you need to make a choice between saving yourself or saving your friendship, choose yourself first. It takes a lot of courage to say “no”. But by saying so, you are showing a lot of courage, honesty and strength. Remember friendship is always between two peers, but there is no balance in your relationship, then it is time to move on.
The views expressed are the author’s own.