It’s The Simpler Things That Are The Most Important: Alexis Ohanian

Alexis Ohanian's essay for Glamour points out how simple things make a marriage more fulfilling than extravagant gestures. While we all know Ohanian for lavish gestures like putting up billboards to celebrate Williams’ first tournament after having their daughter or flying her to Venice on a whim, recently the Reddit co-founder said in an essay it’s the simple things that matter the most. “I get it; these are pretty extravagant gestures. But I think if you were to ask my wife, or many other people in relationships, it’s often the simpler things that are the most important. You have to show up. You have to be supportive. These are the things that matter.”

KEY TAKEAWAYS

• Alexis Ohanian's essay gives a lot to think to those who struggle to define relationships in terms of gestures.
• Should you give in to the pressure of making grand gestures, or should make simple efforts which strengthen your bond?
• No amount of grand gestures can help a couple sustain the initial buzz of attraction and romance, after all.

According to the Reddit founder, it’s the simpler things that matter the most.

Ohanian’s words are food for thought for us, who struggle to define relationships in terms of gestures. What is romance today? How do you tell someone you love them? Should you make a grand and obvious gesture or should you leave bread crumbs which only your partner can pick up? In times of Insta love stories and live streaming trips and weddings on social media, expressing love publicly and with grandeur has become an unspoken norm. But even for the most tech-savvy couple, the major part of a relationship happens offline, away from prying eyes of your friends or social media followers.

Amidst leading public lives, Ohanian and Williams have managed to nurture a healthy partnership on values like equality, their combined love for their daughter and putting in effort to make it work. Ohanian reveals in his essay that he and Serena match schedules, since they both travel a lot, to ensure that, ideally, there isn’t more than a week that they go without seeing each other. It would seem like a lot of labour to put in for some people. But if you ask me this simple gesture of making an effort to be around each other more, speaks more than writing sugary messages and poems about missing your partner on their timeline.

Amidst leading public lives, Ohanian and Williams have managed to nurture a healthy partnership.

It is the little things which make you feel loved and tell your partner about your feelings for them a thousand times effectively over what a message could do. Being a unit which supports each other's career moves is one of them. Another is finding time for each other and yet giving each other space to grow. Having a lunch to catch up after a busy week could do wonders to a relationship. If you could keep the phone usage to a minimum. (I won’t push banishing phones entirely, because who are we kidding?) Simpler gestures like these, which many won’t even classify as romantic will make your relationship last longer.

No amount of grand gestures can help a couple sustain the initial buzz of attraction and romance. For a healthy long-term relationship, they have to work inwards, between the two of them to ensure that their relationship is successful. It is not as easy as projecting a strong relationship on social media. But the result is going to be much more fulfilling.

Picture Credit: ABC

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 Yamini Pustake Bhalerao is a writer with the SheThePeople team, in the Opinions section.  The views expressed are the author’s own